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Monthly Archives: October 2012

14 Days: 14 acts of kindness (2012.W44)

(Ending Sunday 14th November 2012)

Kindness is a selfless act inspired by the love within. It’s a most natural act of love.

Personally I believe we all have a love bulb within us. We have the ability to self-generate the energy and brighten the bulb up any time as we wish. And we all forget about this. In our lives, we have parents, families, friends, colleagues or strangers, people around us who either help us to illuminate brighter or to dim our brightness. We let them influence how bright we are, may be and will be; and neglect the important thing that we are the source of our own brightness.

When the light bulb is on, it radiates warmth and the act of kindness just shines through and takes place itself with abundant love.

The World Kindness Day is coming, on the 13th November! Will you let your love bulb illuminate to the maximum brightness?

Join us!

Challenge: join 14 Days, 14 acts of kindness in PERSONAL EXCELLENCE
Extra Challenge: Extend to 30 Days of kindness
Goals: Just light up the love bulb inside you and let your warmth shine through
Time required: 14 days to 30 days
Energy level: Medium to high
Preparation: Be kind to yourself first ūüôā

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Don’t forget to share with us your experiences and how your life has changed because of the challenge!!

 
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Posted by on October 29, 2012 in Weekly

 

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Self-focused questions “How am I doing lately?”

In my¬†Day 30 – How you love yourself in the coming 90 days?¬†Today‚Äôs home work, end of Sep final updates, a quote of encouragement on¬†Sep 28: “No matter how busy or tired I am, I am committed to take at least 1 hour a week conversing with myself.” And exactly what topics do I talk to myself?

An important question for all of us before all other questions I asked myself is –>

Do I spend enough time with myself, listen to my inner voices and have peace within? 

We all need certain levels of assurance and reassurance to ourselves (that we are being oneself, living the life the way we want and we know what we are doing) and security (where not to worry about getting hurt or suffer, be as free and safe within) in our lives, both physically and mentally, especially the later. These two provide a sense of stability and peace anchoring within ourselves, steady the our inner being, even when our outer surrounding is full of chaos.

The level of assurance and security needed may vary accordingly to our backgrounds, past experiences and most present situations. The source of the providers often we think is and count on others and in fact, we ourselves are the ultimate source. It is for our own well-being and benefits to understand self well, take the responsibility and be our own source provider.

The below is a list of questions I am asking myself on regular basis: (Just be very honest with yourself and not to judge yourself; pay attention to the first answer in mind, it is often the most true reflection of your current thoughts. Be gentle and keep in mind this is to spend quality time with self, not to criticize self)

  • How am I feeling lately? (both physically and mentally)
  • Am I happy?¬†Truly¬†happy? And why is that? May I do something about it? (replacing ‘happy’ with ‘content’, ‘satisfied’, ‘enjoying life’, ‘sad’, ‘angry’, ‘upset’, ‘tired’, ‘stressed’, ‘worried’, ‘calm’, ‘focused’, ‘determined’, ‘relaxed’, ‘appreciative’, ‘creative’, ‘healthy’, ‘demotivated’, ‘judgmental’, ‘blaming’, ‘fearless’, ‘resentful’, ‘growing’, ‘honest’, ‘being loved’, ‘loving’, ‘avoiding’, ‘free spirit’, ‘having hard time’, ‘running out of time’, ‘energetic’, ‘inspired’, ‘lonely’ … etc. you may go through few emotion adjectives as above or select the one best describes you and dig into it.)¬†
  • How far am I from my personal goals? (Do I have a personal goal?)
  • How is my work vs. life balance at the moment?
  • How have I changed emotionally and physically from last month? (How is my well-being?)¬†
  • What can I do differently for myself next month?
  • What did I do last month that I am proud of? (Take time to appreciate how good I am!)
  • Am I growing or learning or enriching myself? (Developing my potential…)
  • What is(are) my priority(ies) in the coming month? (take 1 month at a time – this helps to regain focus on what is important and close to your heart)¬†
  • What makes me happy? (and grant yourself to do that ūüėõ what’s the wait?)
  • If I win 1 million dollars, what would I do and feel?¬†(this question is to encourage dreaming~ every dream with realizable action plans => goals coming true!!)

The purpose of the above question is to constantly be aware of our own thoughts and feelings. Many people who are stressed often neglect the early warnings that are sent out from their mind and bodies. If we are all aware of early signals and having regular check up or conversations with self, life will be much happier and more relaxed!!

While you taking time surfing on the net and reading nice articles, why not take another 5 minutes to answer the above question for yourselves, having a little intimacy with self!!

 
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Posted by on October 25, 2012 in Thoughts

 

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Be daring in declaring love! (2012.W43)

(Ending Sunday 28 October 2012)

In this past Sunday,¬†Lo√Įc¬†and I are engaged!!

Lo√Įc¬†has made his proposal, asking me to marry him, be his wife and be with him forever.¬†Wow… that was a mouth full and very bold in asking, especially the¬†‘be with me forever’!! Or should I say, it’s I who is more daring to say ‘YES‘ (because by saying ‘yes’, I have committed myself; but for him, he just simply asked the questions, not made the¬†commitment).

With this love note and our new long term commitment, I would like to encourage, challenge and dare every reader to boldly express and declare your love!! No matter it is for your girl/boy friend, wife/husband, partner, parents or secret lover, just go ahead and tell them (and again and again) via words and actions!

We all love to be loved and yet afraid to ask and give completely. Our past experiences or hurts plus self-protection mechanism may somehow prevent us to love bravely. Why let it stopping us from being in love and enjoying love? Why not invite ourselves to give a try, be daring and free? How about starting with simply declaring and saying¬†‘I LOVE YOU’¬†or¬†“YOU ARE THE ONE¬†I WANT TO BE WITH”¬†or something intimate from your heart?

It’s your love life, your love call ~

Challenge: Declaring and expressing your love to the one who matters to you
Extra Challenge: Express with words and actions
Goals: To express your love within boldly and freely, leave no regrets and let your love one refilled with your love
Time required: 1 hour
Energy level: Medium-High (on heart & soul level)
Preparation: Prepare 2 declaration of love statements and 1 action

Here are few heart-felt statements for your reference:

  • My life is with a purpose when I am with you
  • I want to live the rest of my life with you
  • You make me feel so special
  • I want to build something great with you in life
  • You are the one I want to be with
  • You are exactly what I need in my life
  • You are my everything, my whole world
  • I want to have children with you
  • You make me feel at home
  • I love you even with your picky character; I learn to appreciate you the whole package
  • You make me feel loved and cherished
  • With you, I may start doing big project and not feeling alone

* Encourage and support us by sharing this post with your friends or clicking ‚ÄúLIKE‚ÄĚ if you like our post:)

Don’t forget to share with us your experiences and how your life has changed because of the challenge!!

 
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Posted by on October 24, 2012 in Weekly

 

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Self-development 101

¬†“The greatest enemy of tomorrow’s success is today’s success”¬†by Rick Warren

I have to admit, I have been¬†complacent with my August Completed – 30 Days on How to love your partner¬†and switching myself completely off from the areas of bucket list challenges writing and self-disciplining to areas of focusing on relaxation and self-indulgence ūüôā

With end of September final updates¬†and reading of¬†“Self-improvement 101” by¬†John C Maxwell. I have woken up from my prolonged self-indulgence and procrastination; realizing that I have been spending lots less time on personal growth. I felt like as if I am standing on an escalator going down, but I am trying to go up; and the moment I stop walking up, I am being taken down by the escalator to the bottom.¬†I did enjoy my own satisfaction and relaxation, but at the same time being fooled by it.

Self-development will not happen by itself for us; it requires dedicated intention and efforts. How much we are willing to invest in ourselves is how much at the end of the day, we will harvest from ourselves. If there is an area of life you would like to develop further, let’s work on it for the coming month. Quoted from Earl Nightingale: “If a person will spend one hour a day on the same subject for five years, that person will be an expert on that subject.” Indeed, 1 hour a day for 5 years, that is 1,825 hours in total, roughly equals to 228 working days (assuming 8 hours per day). It’s like a year of short term study (advance enrichment). I am now amazed that 1 hour a day may turned into something sounds grand, even a second career development!

So, if there is something you would like to spend this 1 hour on? 

It’s not ‘time’ that we don’t have, it’s self-discipline.¬†Once your goal is set (and it has to be your passion), then put yourself into a non-bargain-able¬†daily hour program (refer below example, skip weekend if you want) and
Example: first select your to be developed area or subject (i.e. want to learn an instrument, want to be a life coach or learn photography…) and¬†ENJOY the learning experience (not to be burden by it).

  • monday: read books or articles about it
  • tuesday: take relevant lessons or workshops
  • wednesday: make notes, reflect and integrate¬†knowledge¬†from monday & tuesday
  • thursday: field search (via Internet or stores…) on special techniques, trends and what are being offered on the market
  • friday: put into practices

If you don’t have something in mind, it’s never to late to find out more about yourself and something you are interested!

 
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Posted by on October 23, 2012 in Thoughts

 

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Final Sep update on My 5 self-love actions for the next 90 days (Part 3/3)

Sorry for the delay! Finally it’s here! ūüôā

Day 30 РToday’s home work: Create a self-love plan of 5 action items for the coming 90 days (July, August, September) The below is my 5 self-love actions with final month, end of Sep updates: (my end of August updates and end of July updates)

(1) Read 3 self-love books (1 book by the end of each month)

3rd book checked –¬†Self-improvement 101” by¬†John C Maxwell.

Additional book read: “Social Intelligence: The new science of human relationships” by Daniel Goleman.

(2) One statement per day (30 by each month end)

      • Sep 1 –¬†It’s better to be well prepared than sorry.
      • Sep¬†2 – There is nothing more important than embracing and standing firmly for certain family values. I am making the changes for a better family life
      • Sep¬†3 – The easiest and fastest way to change the world is to change ourselves.
      • Sep¬†4 – Do not let others to decide or to disturb on how I will live through my day today.
      • Sep¬†5 – Nothing is so urgent in life (don’t have to rush all the time), unless when life itself become urgent (facing life and death situation).
      • Sep¬†6 – Helping others is like having pollen and seeds spreading around, we never know what kind of flowers, fruits or outcomes it will bring. It is not so much about expecting any return, but rather not to underestimate the impacts that we bring on others. (I encourage myself keep on spreading the seeds of surprises!)

        • Sep¬†7 – When I start to focus on how much others do for me, I start to realize how little I do for others.¬†
        • Sep¬†8 – Loving self is an important life long subject; but we often forget to keep it in the daily program.
        • Sep¬†9¬†– Take 2-3 hours to do something I like regularly, i.e. per week, I feel much more with myself and ¬†happy with myself.
        • Sep¬†10 – Self-improvement is meant for ‘self’, not for others.
        • Sep¬†11 – Type of life we are living in is reflected in the types of daily activities we do. (if want to change the type of life, we got to change the activities)

  • Sep¬†12 – if we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we are not really living.” by Gail Sheehy
  • Sep¬†13 – Growth is certainly a choice; no one says it is easy, but for sure rewarding!
  • Sep¬†14 – Focus on self-development, not self-fulfillment. (self-development is a bigger goal than self-fulfillment. Self-fulfillment is the by-product benefit of self-development)
  • Sep¬†15 –¬†Anyone appears in our lives for a reason. I may not understand what is the reason right away, but I am willing to explore and learn more from them.
  • Sep¬†16 – Resting is preparing for the next heard work!
  • Sep 17 – Finding life purpose calling is not easy (especially we don’t listen to our hearts), but it will come when we start to pay attention.
  • Sep¬†18 – Sometimes what I think it is good for others may not be the case. Always double check with consideration.
  • Sep 19 – Within an interaction, how I react enrolls how other responses. (meaning if I want my boss to trust me that I am handling everything well, I need to first show my boss I am handling my boss well)
  • Sep 20 – Where I am being myself and expose myself, it does not mean I am weak and vulnerable. I just choose to let others to see the naked me. (don’t have to guess me)
  • Sep¬†21 – He who dares loving, trying and giving is really living!
  • Sep¬†22 – Managing self is easier than managing others; nevertheless, we like to manage others first.
  • Sep 23 – A winner knows how much he still has to learn, even when he is considered an expert by others; a loser wants to be considered as an expert before he has learned enough to know how little he knows. by Sydney Harris
  • Sep 24 – Live like there is no next month.
  • Sep¬†25 – It’s not ‘time’ that we don’t have, it’s self-discipline.
  • Sep¬†26 – Develop a plan, working toward according to the plan and discipline myself without any excuses.
  • Sep¬†27 – What is life like with a limited life with unfulfilled potentials?
  • Sep 28 – No matter how busy or tired I am, I am committed to take at least 1 hour a week conversing with myself (i.e.how I am feeling, how I have been, am I happy, how far am I from my personal goals, how is my life/work balance and so on).
  • Sep¬†29¬†–¬†Always give self extra credit, support and courage to do things desired.
  • Sep¬†30 – “The greatest enemy of tomorrow’s success is today’s success” by Rick Warren

(3) Two hours of exercise per week (8.5 hours every month) 65% checked – took an hour every week during lunch time to do some fast walking around the block and 30 minutes stretching each night before going to bed. Certainly over the past 90 days, there were still room to improve; and I keep on telling myself to continue going ahead, not to let yesterday’s failure dis-encourages tomorrow’s success!

(4) Two activities per month that I would love to do with myself (2 activities to share each month) Checked! Take a good bath with oil, home made ice tea with candle and music ūüôā Treat myself with world famous singer concert (Madonna’s concert)!!

(5) Save $100 per month for the thing that I always wanted ($100 more at the end of each month) Checked! Not only I have saved $300, a friend of mine has given me an iPAD as a gift! So wonderful~ it’s like when I start to accumulate wealth, wealth itself multiplies!!! (law of attraction?)

 
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Posted by on October 21, 2012 in Thoughts

 

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Expand your knowledge (2012.W40)

(Ending Sunday 7th October 2012)

Ever wonder how much knowledge you will have now if instead of watching TV you would be studying?

Some facts:

According to the A.C. Nielsen Co., the average American watches more than 4 hours of TV each day (or 1440 hours of nonstop TV-watching per year). In a 65-year life, that person will have spent 9 years glued to the tube.

For learning a new language we need around 900 hours to 3000 hours depending of the complexity of the language.

So, if instead of watching TV we would be studying a language, we would master a new language each year.

Don’t get me wrong, I love spend time on TV, video games, internet… Or sometimes I am just too tired to learn something.

A day is just 24 hours and we have so much more hours available when we are in control of what we can do with it. We should spend it carefully and wisely.

To be more conscious of the amount of time and lost opportunity we spend on TV, Facebook, playing video games or chattering away and so on, I’d propose a new challenge:

Replace the time we spend on watching TV or playing games with something educational.

By doing so, you don’t have to really change your habit. You just replace the content of what you are watching. It should be much easier than directly stopping TV, but still beneficial.

For Cindy and me, we will be watching free video courses from Coursera. So we will have lessons from great teachers about history, mythology, model thinking and so on.

You think you can do it? Start right now to plan what you be will watching and see you next week to see how it goes ~

Challenge: Replace the time we watch TV by watching something educational
Extra Challenge: Do it for one month!!!
Goals: To take more conscience of the amount of time and lost opportunities as we spend time on TV
Time required: The time you spend on TV
Energy level: Medium to low
Preparation: Please plan ahead now on what you will be watching and learning for the coming week. So when time comes to watch TV, you have no excuse not to watch pre-planned educational programs.

* Encourage and support us by sharing this post with your friends or clicking ‚ÄúLIKE‚ÄĚ if you like our post:)

Don’t forget to share with us your experiences and how your life has changed because of the challenge!!

 
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Posted by on October 1, 2012 in Weekly

 

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