One plus one always equals more than two in a relationship.
In your relationship with your partner, how often do you both take time to share knowledge, life experiences and daily practical tips with each other? How do you take time to teach, show and lead each other? How humble are you while being taught, how comfortable are you in showing something to your partner and how respectful is your partner of you while taking the lead?
We have started learning since as a child from our parents, our siblings, then from our teachers, fellow students, friends, extending to from our employers, colleagues as we progress in life stages. Somehow and some of us seem just stopped learning; but our lives continue. There are still lots to learn from our partner, in-laws, or our subordinates, our neighbors or even from our children and grand children. Life is a forever ending learning process. Why all of a sudden we just stop learning at certain points or certain topics or from certain someone?
Perhaps it is not you; it’s good for you and your partner! But if it is you, it’s not too late to be aware of it right now; because you may still make a different choice. Take some time to trace down memory lane, when was the last time you learnt something from your partner? Or something your partner is trying to teach you and show you, but you weren’t interested? What caused the breakdown in learning from your partner? Any instances where your partner is trying to lead you into something (i.e. ideas, actions or habits…) or out of something (i.e. negative thoughts, repetitive patterns…etc.) and you just block your partner outside? Is it ‘ego’ blocking the communication and humble learning? Or the ‘beliefs’ like ‘I am better than you, I know more than you, I don’t need you to tell me…’ stopping you from learning?
No matter what your reasons are; they are all parts of you and just accept the reasons as they are; the way they contributed to the ‘you are’ today. From this moment, you have the choice to decide what type of a partner you want to be to your partner and what type of relationship you are looking for. If you are looking for a well balanced, equally contributed relationship, you would need to allow this space first for yourself to be well-balanced, equally leading your partner and be lead by your partner; you would also enroll your partner to have the same space for him or herself. Then later on, when the two spaces emerge, this creates a bigger space for synergy to be formed between you two based on your humbleness, willingness to learn, to lead and to be lead by each other.
Today I love my partner by: (share it aloud to your partner)
Challenging myself out of comfort zone and let my partner teach, show, guide and lead me.
For your actions:
(1) Find out what are the areas that your partner tries to or is teaching, guiding and leading you? How do you response to it and feel about it?
(2) Invite your partner to teach you or show you something that your partner knows but you don’t know. (Note: even for the subject you think you know it all, there may still be something new to learn.)