“I’m continually trying to make choices that put me against my own comfort zone. As long as I am uncomfortable, it means I am growing.” By Ashton Kutcher
None of us like to be challenged or confronted most of the time; and yet there is always at least one person who will challenge and confront us out of our comfort zone in life, believing we are much more than what we currently are, no matter we like it or see it or not. It may be our parents, our teachers, our friends, our colleagues or bosses, our partners or even we. This person uses all imaginable ways to invite, enroll, pull, push or force us in taking a leap of faith to try new things, new beliefs and new experiences, so we may go beyond ourselves. This person has strong faith in us and commits to our personal growth more than we ever have for ourselves. Who is this person in your life?
Ever notices that it is easier for us to try something new which we are keen about than something new however we are not too enthusiastic? It seems more challenging for us to try new things that we are not so interested in. Most of us like to be in an environment which is stable, familiar and comfortable, so that we remain in controls and are able to anticipate what’s happening next with no surprises. To step out of comfort zone requires fast learning, ability to adapt and courage to face uncertainties and take up the loss of total control. It sounds daunting for some of us; yet it sounds extreme exciting and promising for some!
How does it sound for you and your partner? Do you both embrace personal learning and growth? Do you challenge each other to be a better self or out of own comfort zones? How do you support each other while challenging each other? Or perhaps both of you are happy staying at own comfort zones? There is no right or wrong answer, but an answer that both of you have chosen and happy about.
As we all just live once and there are so many things out there to offer, why not make the best out of them, out of what you can give and receive? Live up to your full potentials?
Do you recognize your partner’s full potentials? While challenging your partner out of his or her comfort zones, not to forget your involvements and supports are very important. You may support your partner via:
- believing in your partner’s potentials and best abilities that he or she can achieve it
- discussing, rationalizing the challenges with your partner, assisting him or her to understand what are the potential benefits of taking up the challenges
- listening carefully your partner’s resistances and helping to find out what are the root resistances, i.e. scare of failure, hurts, death or lose control…etc
- encouraging with words and actions, affirming and making them feel good about taking up the challenges
- following through your partner’s development progress and be there for your partner
- leading by example that you challenge yourself too or do the same challenges as your partner, be with your partner’s challenge buddy
- leveraging on the influence of others who your partner respects, asking them to encourage and support your partner too
- getting familiar with the new challenging environment and to be with people who share the same challenges
Today I love my partner by: (share it aloud to your partner)
Challenging my partner out of his or her comfort zone with my love and support.
For your actions:
(1) Do you recognize your partner’s full potentials? How do you see your partner is greater than he or she currently is? Consider to challenge your partner going beyond his or her current ability; if yes, in what areas?
(2) Think through how you will challenge your partner out of his or her comfort zones, i.e. why is it important, in which areas, what are the benefits and in what tone or manner will you use to communicate.
(3) Ask yourself the same question (1) above.